My writing stalls quite often for one pathetic reason: I can't guarantee the end result. I am never short on ideas. Quite the opposite: they swarm so furiously through my mind, I am paralyzed by indecision. Before I focus in on one idea, I want to know if the time spent will be worth the effort. I want to know what the end result will be. Funny, but I would never skip to the end of, say, a book I'm reading. Regardless of whether I am worried or excited about the ending, I want to immerse myself in the journey from start to finish.
Not so when I write. I would prefer to skip over uncertainty, fear, and trial and error. I want to skip the possibility of failure, embarrassment, oversharing. I want to skip to the good parts, skip to the known results, skip to the happy ending.
But as a writer, what would that happy ending look like? Maybe I've been looking at success through the too-narrow lens of publication. Maybe success doesn't depend on whether I ever sign another publishing contract or whether I ever sell another freelance piece. Maybe success is taking new steps toward my dreams every day and enjoying the process of learning and creating and growing.
After all, every worldly success brings a brief celebration, followed by a new longing for the next achievement--a recurring
longing that drains creativity and squashes joy. So, maybe I don't want to skip to the end. Maybe it's time to write like I read: with curiosity, expectant hope, and the belief that skipping to the end would spoil the best parts of the story.